Thursday, December 1, 2016

My Baby Made Me an Asshole

I maybe mentioned elsewhere that, before baby, I thought of myself as a pretty easygoing, laid back kinda guy.  Patient.  Some time in the last 14 months, that guy turned into kind of an asshole.

I used to be generous with my time.  Now, if The Baby is asleep, it's My Time and woe unto the poor soul who asks anything of me during that time.  The Wife just called me from her office to ask that I find an official document for her, and I was wildly disproportionately annoyed by the imposition.  All I had to do was walk to the kitchen, the next room over, and look at a piece of paper for her, and I was pissed.  All I was doing at the time was reading the newspaper...

I used to be really laid back, going with the flow, up for whatever life had to throw at me.  Some of that is still there, but if anything messes with my routine, I am again disproportionately annoyed.  So The Baby decided to nap long, or short, and all of a sudden I need to change when I go to Trader Joe's?  OH HELL NO.

Some of it is lack of sleep.  I just don't sleep restfully anymore.  I know this isn't unique to me; I just didn't think it would happen to me.  The Baby sleeps great.  Down for the night at 7:30pm, sleeps straight through until at least 6:30am.  At least one good, chunky nap during the day.  But I toss and turn at night.  I wake before my alarm and can't get back to sleep.  I have one great but very specific responsibility - keep The Baby alive - but all the other stupid shit runs through my head.  Is the snow blower ready to go?  Did I get the garbage out?  What are we gonna get the in-laws for Christmas?  All this stupid shit that, while too important to ignore, is not nearly important enough that it should keep me awake.  But it does.

Anyway...  Pity party for one, now service this pathetic asshat.